Happy Birthday To Me!

Me Turned 20

This post kinda late but that doesn't change the fact I already turned 20 on 20 March 2020. Alhamdulillah and thanks to everyone because being a part of my life. May Allah showers you with continuous happiness! So I think I'm gonna write a letter to my 10 year-old self. 

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A Letter to My 10 Year-Old Self

Dear You,

Yeah it's me, your 20 year-old self. I'm gonna give some advice that really going to help you to get through another 10 years ahead. 

First of all, you gonna prepare yourself to sit for UPSR examination in 2012 but don't worry it's easy hehehe. How do I know? Well I'm you after all. 

2013 will be a starting point where you will experience all sort of emotions. At 13, you will pursue your study in a boarding school. Even though separated from your parents, you still think that everything will be fine but hell no. During 5 years in a boarding school, you will grow with a trust issue. No one want to befriend with you but you never know the real reasons for that. Trying to change your behavior, change the way you talk, trying to get a position in school societies so you can be famous - because you just wanna fit yourself in your friend's circle. You want to have a friend at least so you can share your feelings. You want to be acknowledge by your friends. Later on, boys start to body shaming you, start to face shaming you. People make fun of you. You'll cry a lot. At that moment, you think you have no worth at all. At the middle of your senior years, you start to have friends. Real friends. The one that will be there for you through thick or thin.

At 18 to 19, you’ll be angry at the decisions your parents make for you. You feel helpless as a child for having no right to choose anything that you want. You start to have a serious feeling of love towards someone. From a person to another. The latest one gonna hurt you. You will not cry as hard as the previous one because you already adapt that kind of feelings. At some point, the tears stop, but your heart won’t cease crying for the next few months.

I am here writing this letter to you. I want to say that you are an amazing person. You have no idea how strong you are. The tears and rejection that you will go through for 10 years ahead not gonna stop you from being kind to others. You will hurt someday because you are going to put yourself in so much pain either intentional or accidental. But heyy! Don't give up! You are amazing. You are worth for living. You are enough. You always care more about your friends than yourself. You are beautiful with your own way.

With loves,

Yourself in 20